Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Take a deep breath.
I am so upset with myself..... I went to urgent care today with a killer sore throat, sinus, gunky cough. I have not felt good and been dragging along for some time BUT decided I had enough and was going to see what to do to get over this. I have a horrible sinus infection, bacterial sore throat, and the cough???? The Dr. kept listening and asking me questions. Yes, I was diagnosed with asthma a few years ago and It had improved so much with my weight loss and getting off the narcotic meds. Yes, I have been coughing more I told him. Yes, it has been productive.(yuck) Yes, I have been tired and noticed wheezing. Especially when exercising and exerting my self. He then began looking on charts and pulled out a little meter to measure how hard I can blow out. He had me do it and looked at the meter and said try again. After three tries he said you are not moving air very well. You are only about half the movement that a "woman YOUR age" should be doing. He gave me a big shot, put me on antibiotics and prednisone for a few days, and told me to use my rescue inhaler more than I usually do and to see my personal Dr. in a couple of weeks when things settle down to discuss options to get that air moving better. I came out of there so upset. I don't want this.....I don't deserve this.....On and on I went. Came home and called my husband bawling and complaining that I was so frustrated. He told me that it was not the end of the world that it can be fixed. He was with two of my son's and I soon got a call from one of them saying.....settle down....You know you have had this issue for a while and look at all you have done. You walk, hike, exercise, work, and keep going even when you don't feel good. He said think what you can do if you can get more air????? I looked at the glass half empty instead of a glass half full. That is why I am so upset with myself. Where is my fighting attitude? I have fought through some of the hardest things life can give to me. Why did I let this get me so down? I need to focus on feeling better, educating myself about the options and (my favorite all time quote from finding Nemo) KEEP ON SWIMMING.