Tapioca Pudding Song

We use to have a family tradition that I want to share here. It is something that I have done ever since my children were tiny. Occasionally on a cold night I would cook a big pot of Tapioca Pudding. The kind you have to cook and stir while it boils for a few minuets.  We all loved it. Then while it was nice and warm I would add a BIG dollop of whipped cream to each serving.  The highlight of this treat for me was when I got to sing and dance the Tapioca Pudding song!!!! My kids loved it when they were small but when they got to be teens they thought they were to cool to enjoy it. In 2004 we were experimenting with a little video camera and it was decided that I should perform my famous song and dance. The other day one of my kids was going thought some old video's and found my dance.  I was not at my heaviest yet, add about 20 more pounds to what I look like on this video. I think I had some pretty smoooooth moves for my size. We have all watch it and remembered how much fun it use to be.

S-U-C-C-E-S-S!

"S-u-c-c-e-s-s, that's the way you spell SUCCESS!"  That cheer I use to scream at all the high school balls games has been running through my mind the last couple of days. I have heard a lot about success lately and want to comment a little about what I think about success. I know that some people think that success is when you have a mansion, a sleek little sports car, money to burn, fabulous clothes and jewelry. I have always had a little different outlook about success. To me success is getting up in the morning and getting dressed down to your lace up shoes! Learning how to tie lace up shoes. Success is walking to the mail box and back if you have a lot of weight to loose or don't feel well. Success is going to work at 6:30 in the morning, teaching other peoples children all day, going home to your other full time job (mom.) It is following a very ridged strict diet and regaining your health. Driving by The Sugar Cookie and waving instead of stopping for a dozen cookie. ( Or just buying 2 cookies instead of 4.) Having your children bloom before your eyes when giving the security of a stable home. Changing to a job that is commission and giving it your all. Being honest in all your dealings with people. Starting a new job that keeps you home nights with your family even though it is working for someone else. Going back to school to be able to provide a more stable future for your family. Facing your fears and conquering them.  Accepting change and pressing forward with a new company. Having a  son that wants to get up and tell you goodbye and walk you to the door in the early morning hours just because he wants to see you. Going home at the end of the day and saying to yourself you have given a fair day's work for a fair day's pay. Getting 100% on a second grade spelling test. Learning to read. Memorizing times table.(I struggle with 7-12)  Playing hard. Laughing hard. Loving hard. Feeling good about what you have done. That's the way I spell success.

Rich or Poor?

This post is a little different than most of them. It is not really on a healthy journey but more just on some reflective thinking. After having a conversation with one of my children I remembered some of the things that happened when I was growing up. Then later that day I was looking through a drawer for something and found an E-mail my sister had sent to my son. It was then I decided I needed to share this.
    A few years ago my son was going to record a Christmas CD and asked about some of the families favorite songs. My sister asked for Christmas shoes and so he used it.  She wrote to him about why she liked it. I quote her, " I love this song because it reminds me of your grandma." (my mother) "We weren't the richest people in town but she always made sure we got what we needed. I don't know if your mom remember this or not, but one Christmas was pretty slim. Grandpa (my dad) had been in and out of the hospital with blood clots in his legs. He was off work for over a year. Anyway, Kevin, your mom and I all got a new coat for Christmas (olive green corduroy for me and your mom.) I don't remember that we got anything else, but I'm sure we must have had candy but the coat was mostly it. I caught mom crying a few days later and come to find out she was crying because she felt so bad she hadn't been able to get us much for Christmas."
       I do remember that Christmas.  I want to share a little of my memories now. We really did not have a lot. Even in food. One of our neighbors worked for Meadow Gold Dairy and took care of stocking the stores with product. As one of the "perks" of his job he was able to bring home the outdated  milk, sour cream, and cottage cheese to feed as slop to his pigs. He had an old farm truck and he would just toss the stuff into the back of it  He would come home to change his clothes before he did the chores. I remember going over and digging through that truck bed to find any of the milk or cottage cheese that had not split open and take it home to use. We just did not have money for those things. Oh we had milk. It was mixed from powder. Never could we buy cottage cheese. Then the wonderful day happened. One of the freezers in one of the stores had broken and he brought home a whole truck bed full of  ICE CREAM!!!!!!  He let us know he had it because he knew we were using the other stuff.  I remember digging through cartons and cartons of melting ice cream. Carton's smashed, tore, and leaking everywhere.    I found several that I thought sounded good and  were intact but leaky. I took them home and washed them and refroze them.  I do not recall ever having ice cream in the freezer before this. I picked out orange sherbet with vanilla swirled through it and a chocolate chip... The orange to this day is my favorite. It was so good. My mother had a cousin who had a little market store on the other side of town. She would go there to do shopping. I think she must have been given the old damaged and dented cans of food because I don't remember many cans that we had that were not damaged. We were on assistance from our church for a long time and she would go put in hours of volunteer work to "repay" the food bill. My grandpa Johnny would bring us old brown bananas, wrinkled up plums, bruised and spoiling fruit. ("this part is still good. Just cut that bad off.")  I didn't know until a few years later that he was climbing into the store dumpsters and getting their old food. (I found this out the hard way when walking home from 9th grade one day with my friends we heard someone crying for help and it was him unable to get out of the dumpster) Thank goodness I had great friends who did not share that with the whole school. I did not like fruit and vegetables until I had grown and found out how good  fresh produce is.  I am not sharing this to say "poor me."  I did not go without. I did not know I was poor.  I share it because in looking  back I realize I was rich. I had a Mother who worked hard and provided the things we needed. I had a Dad who was very sick but still went to work whenever his health allowed him even while being in terrible pain. I had sisters and a brother who I had many happy days with. We had neighbors and relatives who helped in many ways.  If anything I am grateful for those experiences because they help me to realize how truly "rich" I am.

Stand by Me!

As I was out walking the other day the song, "Stand by Me" came on the radio and my mind was immediately flooded with memories of another time I heard that song.  One of the many tasks I was asked to do to help me continue on my recovery of Narcotic addiction was to attend at least 3 meetings a week at the local chapter of NA(narcotics anonymous.)  I decided when I started on this journey that I would do EVERYTHING I could to become well.  I did go almost every day for the year that they asked me to complete. I went and listened, wept, read, and was overwhelmed by the many stories that had brought others to those doors.  I learned many things there. I learned that every family is touched by addiction. Every age, gender, rich, poor, sweet mothers, hard working fathers, sons, daughters, young, old, grandpas, and granny's. It is everywhere.  Our Chapter was sponsoring a convention to bring in speakers who had fought the battle of addiction and were living the life of recovery. I decided to go and learn what I could. At the end of the day there was a general meeting for all those in attendance. The large ballroom was full of people in different degrees of addiction. They asked all of us to stand  in a large circle and hold hands with those on both sides of us. The granny holding hands with the large bald headed tattooed biker who was holding hands with the shaking 17 year old girl who was clean for 2 days. Every walk of life was in that circle. There was silence then the music began. "Stand by me'" softly played as we continued to hold hands and look into each other's faces. It was a very powerful moment.
      I have seen many of the people in that circle go on to reclaim the lives that they had  lost and do great things. Sadly many of them continue  fighting their addictions. Some are in jail. Quite a few have passed.   I know that much of my strength comes from my great family who stand by me every step of this journey. For that I am truly blessed.

Hurry!

I have been able to walk my two grandson's to school a few times in the past few weeks. I walk them to school and then go on a long walk through the beautiful fields.  The older one goes out the door and is on his way. He has plans to get there and get a kick ball to play with before school. He wants to be sure they are not all gone. Sometimes they like to ride their scooters but today I said no. There were to many very tempting puddles to splash through.  They both reassured me they would miss all of them but they didn't know that I have experience in the little boy and wheels department and NO little boy can resist a great big puddle. So off we went. The younger one and I usually walk together. I will walk a little and stop and wait for him to catch up. He loves school and has no reason to drag behind so I constantly tell him to hurry. He would come running and off we would go again, and again, and again. I decided that today I would walk with him and see what was slowing him down so much. We headed out and the first thing that happened is we got about 2 drops of light rain on us. He had a big concern until I told him that if it really started to rain we could put his backpack on top of his head like an umbrella.  Off we go and I turn to look for him because he is already behind and he has already adjusted his backpack/umbrella on his head.  He had kept the arms in the straps and pulled the backpack up on his head. "Look it works great Granny." We made it past about 3 houses and he had to walk on the low retaining wall running along the sidewalk. Then a little more and we hear a big "thwack" as we startle a few bird and one flys into a window. We have to look for it to see if it is okay. Moving forward again.  Then I hear, "look at those cool snails." I have to admit they were pretty cool. They were tiny and had a long tapered shell. I had never seen that kind before. Next the question was, "can I smash them." No I told him other people might want to see how cool they are. Then a climb on a big rock and jumping down. Moving again. Next he stops and gazes into an open garage. He keeps saying something about a shiny Mongoose.  He really wants one of those. I realized that he was talking about a BMX bicycle that he has admired many times as we have walked by.  Slowly moving as he continues to try to spot the bike in the garage.  Then we hear honk, honk, honk. A flock of Canadian geese fly right over us in perfect formation.  They were low and slow. We had to stand and watch them until they were out of sight. As we continue walking we have to stop and look at all the different dogs that are looking out of their side gates at us. I counted about  7. He is very good to always stay on the sidewalk and not go into yards so just stands in the middle of the sidewalk and looks. Then we came to a house that must have a bunch of boys that like to do tricks on their bikes. There was an assortment of boards, bricks, and other boy type building materials in the yard and on the sidewalk. There was a piece of board propped  against the curb to make a small ramp. Of course he had to go up and down that several times. Then he found a piece of pipe that was flat on one side that  he could make a ramp to walk  down and now a ramp to walk up. Cool...  We are almost there. Off he runs because by now big brother has got a kick ball and would be out playing with their friends on the field. He didn't want to miss that. I continue walking  and thought of all the "cool" things we got to see. I don't know if he would have made it to school on time without a little prodding along but he sure had an adventure on the way.  Maybe we all need to quit saying "hurry" and slow down just a little and look for an injured bird, cool snails, Canadian geese, Mongoose BMX bikes, neighbors dogs, walls to climb, rocks to jump off, and ramps to build. And of course we need to all be sure to wear our backpack/umbrella!!!!!

Wrong blog post...

Apparently I posted MY update on my mom's blog. For those of you getting emails from her blog...sorry about that! Disregard the last post!

Emily

You can look like that!

I never know what I am going to hear on any given day that motivates me to keep going. I try to find ways to lift others up too. I know that many times just a small comment can make a huge difference in a person's day. I think it often lifts me up more that the person I am talking to.  Today as I was talking to my H20 aerobic instructor she mentioned the changes she had seen in me over the past three years.  She commented that she thought I was now smaller than her.......and I was immediately reminded of something that happened three years ago. When I first started in H20 aerobics I was so impressed with this instructor. She really worked us, had a lot of energy, and was very enthusiastic. She did not seem to mind that the pool was full of "Oldies." She just got going and kept going.  I was going every day and would often mention to my family that they should give it a try, that it was a great total body work out. Now my one son is very into the weight lifting and training at the gym. He would kinda smirk at me and say okay. I finally convinced him to try the class. So here he was this young, handsome, bearded, buff dude in the pool with all of us "oldies." He told me after that the workout was great. (what else could he say to his mother?) There was something that he said to me that has impacted me and given me so much drive. I commented to him about how strong and muscular the instructor was. I would love to look like her. He looked at me and said, "you CAN look like that." I just scoffed at him and said, "right!" He said. "No you really can. You have the potential to do that. You have a similar body type to hers.(under this layer of fat I thought) You will  not get as muscular as her but you can change your body if you want."  I have thought about that comment often, it has motivated me many times to keep going. I can look like that!!!!! I have to do the work but I can.  Now- I am not muscular but I have muscles.  I can not lift weights as heavy or as long as her but I can lift weights. I can not walk the many miles she walks as she does her dog walking job but I can walk.  Just that one little comment has motivated me into trying many different types of exercise and to work harder. Thank you son for teaching me. Yes, I can look like that.  One comment that gave me hope. I want you to have that hope and know you too can, "look like that."